So I came to a conclusion.
Well, we all know how I'm a non-practicing Roman Catholic. Well, my mom and I attended a wedding on Saturday and aside from not wanting my wedding there, I also realized why I'm a non-practicing Roman Catholic. My mom and dad were not married by the church, so the church tends to view her situation as a "sin", hence, she can't take the Eucharist. Now remember, my mom has been a devote Catholic. I have the belt marks to prove it, and the communion-confirmation to boot! Anyway, I've told her to go up and partake of the "body and blood" of Christ but her being the devote Catholic woman she is, won't do it because the church told her it's wrong. There's one thing I agree with and that's that the church is run by men (men being the operative word). How can a "man" tell people that they know God's mind? I don't think Christ stopped anyone from going to the last supper and said, "You're not worthy, go next door!" Remember, even Judas was allowed to sit at the table even though Christ knew what Judas was about to do. I used to be proud to say that I was not only a Catholic but a Roman Catholic. Now, I prefer to say a non-practicing Roman Catholic.

That's not the only beef I have against the Catholic church. The thing that are going on now are just symptoms of a deeper disease! I'm sorry to say, but I feel that the church has become corrupt. It's time for an over haul. [*All except Pope John Paul II. He's the only cool cat!]
Anyway, I've realized that the church has been infested with hypocrites. They find an easy fix on going to confession and being cleansed of their disease only to return the next week to repeat their confession word for word. I've done wrong in my life, but at least I've realized that I'm flawed and that I'm human instead of hiding behind the purple vestments of "men" who say they can save our souls. I have a secret: God is the only one who can cleanse us of our wicked ways and even then, you don't need a denomination, you need to believe in a supreme power. You need to realize that there is something guiding our existence. People can deny God, but can people deny our purpose? Even if it's by scientific means, can you deny that our existence was peculiar? Protein ooze, monkeys or alien hybrids, can you stand there and say that our existence was not the strange combination of different circumstances? A chain of events that somehow created a conscious mind, or soul to the philosophers out there.

And it's not just the Catholic church. I heard that there's another church out there that will not let you worship in their church (building) unless you give money up front. "Money up front" before entering the building! Please tell me that I've heard wrong!?! Please tell me that I'm full of it and that I don't know what I'm talking about!?! Does anyone still read the bible!? Don't we remember what Christ did when he found mercantilism going on in his "fathers house"? It's alright to support your churches, but put a fixed price on people in order for them to worship. GOD IS NOT A BUILDING! GOD IS NOT A QUICK FIX! GOD IS NOT A THING TO ACQUIRE! God is that which should be strived for. You won't find him in poverty or riches. You'll find him where you do good for all. We are not a world of individuals, we are a single world of many.

What else can I say? I've just reached a fork in the road. Actually, not a fork in the road but a stand. Oh, by the way, the realization I came to during the wedding is that it's OK to go to church, but treat it as you would treat any other house. For instance, respect it as you would respect your friends or families house. The difference is is that the owner is "out of town on business" and the house sitters know you are welcome by their boss. Some of you know what I think about going to church. Thinking what I think, I feel like the biggest hypocrite there. Until Saturday, I felt that way. Not anymore. I guess it goes for all denominations. They may think differently, but I justify their beliefs as their belief in the same God, only on different terms. It doesn't make anyone wrong and anyone wrong. It's like Mexican families, like my family, tend to believe that they can pray to a certain Saint and they would pass the word along to God or that Jesus was a prophet along with Mohammad and that Allah is the true God. These distinctions came from a time when men needed to believe they were right. Must we follow in their footsteps? How dare we say that ours is the only right way and everyone else is going to burn in H-E-double hockey sticks! How much more controlling and demanding can we be?

Don't let others dictate your beliefs. There are morals and "social values" to follow. Moral's are the same for all: do no harm and do for others. Social values differentiate. You have to decide what will benefit the world and do them(do no harm and do for others). Social values come from bad preaching. Not religious, but it can be. But if someone tells you something that conflicts with your moral's(do no harm and do for others), turn away. Your beliefs are yours, and we should all understand them all, not just our own. Think consciously through all the ideas that different people have and you will find what you're missing. One day, you'll understand. I may not be pure of heart because of the journey I've taken to this point in my life, but at least I can say that I've become aware. Aware. Not everyone can say that. Plus, the world will look a lot more differently.