i'm such a bad son. i'm grumpy and all my mom wants to do is help, but since i'm such a bastard, i snap because i decide to stay awake for grotesque amounts of time at a time. what they hell was it even for? i mean, i got nothing useful done. i still have to work on that damn supreme court case for gilded age. i still haven't even finished reading that damn book. public opinion in america (class) is not what i expected, nor is love and death. it seems that everything is shitty this semester and to top it all off, i can't consentrate on one thing at a time because my mind keeps racing. i even think i started having chest pains. jeez!!!! i can't get on the ball because...oh yeah...i broke andy's bed (sitting on it, nothing more). fixed it of course but now i'm self conscious all over again. self esteem is such a prick. i really can't do anything right, can i!? anyway, my STITCH here in life is just to make myself, and those around me, miserable. come wednsday, gilded age professor will ram that quiz up my exhaust pipe and drop me from his class under the pretense that i'm too stupid to teach and any effort from him will be a waste of time and intelligence, and that if i continue to attend, the environment will be negatively affected and the universe will cease to exist.

WOW, i've never been that harsh with my self, on a conscious level before. anyway, i think i'm still sleepy. i skipped my public opinion class because...well...no damn reasonable excuse. sitting in that class is like listening to someone scratch chalkboard. i'm starting to think it's just me. it's really not my classes or my life, but i'm in one of those slumps that i just can't control right now. i'll figure it out. i just need to put my mind into ONE thing at a time and not worry about the whole lot. for instance, right after this, i'll work on the supreme court case. that's all, no more no less.

i started reading HOCUS POCUS by Vonnegut. i've never said this about a book before, but it's relazing. i'll save it for down time.